I’m going back to my old ways. You see, once upon a time I was very careful as to which movies I’d watch, but then something happened. I got too caught up caring what other people thought instead of what God thought. And so I started watching the movies everyone was watching. All those PG-13s everyone sees without batting any eye? I watched a lot of them. And for the past two or so years that I’ve been doing this, I’ve noticed a steady decline in my spirituality.
Now, over the past few weeks I’ve had several friends mention their media standards. What used to be normal for me — watching hardly any PG-13s, for example — now felt almost absurdly rigid and stifling. But after three or four knocks on my door, God started to get through to me. I’ve finally woken up out of my Hollywood-induced trance.
So, I’m taking the higher road. From now on, if movies don’t harmonize with the standards and values I’ve learned from the gospel, I won’t watch them. Period. (Same for books, but this seems to be less of an issue. That’s a topic for another post.) Yes, this means the number of movies I watch will be drastically reduced. Yes, it also means I won’t fit in as well socially. After all, people with higher media standards get labeled as puritans and extremists, crazy radicals who obviously Just Don’t Get It. You know what? I don’t care. I know what’s right for me, and I’m sick of letting the world push me around with its peer pressure. Brand me as a heretic if you want, but I’m walking out of the theater so I can go find my God again.
Is this for everyone? I don’t know. But my bet is that most of us are living beneath our privileges, cheating ourselves out of the richer communion with the Spirit that we could otherwise be having. We’re desensitizing ourselves far more than we realize. Oh, wait, that’s not politically correct. People want to feel good about the path they’re already on. Besides, isn’t everybody doing it? And they’re all going to church and seem to be doing okay, right? Well, I’m sorry, but “everyone’s doing it” isn’t the philosophy I want to live by.
Look, I’m not saying people who are caught up watching the world’s shows won’t go to heaven. I think God is a lot more forgiving than we realize, honestly. And this isn’t a crusade to change what anyone else is watching; I’m just trying to change myself.
Yes, there are plenty of good stories out there. Yes, you can have intense emotional experiences with many of the world’s movies. And you might even be able to feel the Spirit during parts of them (I’m not entirely sure how that works, based on what I know of the Spirit and its avoidance of the ungodly, but I’m not going to say what God can or can’t do). But I’m aiming for godhood, and most of the movies and television shows out there aren’t helping me get there. In fact, they’re pushing me in the opposite direction. I don’t want to feel like extramarital sex is normal. I don’t want four-letter words floating around in my head. I want peace, not gratuitous violence. And I’m sick of imbibing the world’s subtle philosophies against faith and values.
So, goodbye to all the movies I would have watched had I not just stepped off that course and onto a new path. I won’t really miss you. But I’ll feel a lot better — less of the split-soul syndrome I’ve been suffering from for the past few years when I was trying to straddle the line with one leg in Babylon and one in Zion. I want God more than I want entertainment. I want the Spirit more than I want to be accepted by my peers. And I want holiness more than I want Hollywood.
Comments
Ben:
I especially like this part: “…my bet is that most of us are living beneath our privileges, cheating ourselves out of the richer communion with the Spirit that we could otherwise be having.”
I think you’re absolutely correct. Like you, I don’t feel comfortable prescribing a standard for others, but I do think people should take more responsibility for their media choices. I get the sense that a lot of people are satisfied with consuming what everyone else is consuming just because it’s easy. And I get the sense that they separate their media choices from their spirituality, rather than using media to enrich their spirituality–using it to instruct and refine their spirits. It’s so lovely when I find media that does that–that takes truths I already cherish and deepens my understanding of them. I love buying books and DVDs that I feel comfortable putting on my shelf next to my scriptures. I love discovering films and novels that I feel comfortable literally thanking God for. And I feel very grateful to those artists and producers who are willing to craft (and fund) worthwhile media.
You know, after a while it gets kind of fun to be oblivous about Hollywood. For example, I had no idea the Grammy awards were last night until somebody talked about it on twitter as it started. My wife and I go to Redbox every once in a while and have no clue what 90% of the movies are about.
When we do decide to watch a movie, we first check it out on kids-in-mind.com to see if it jives w/ our standards (thus trying to take the proactive method, as opposed to the reactive one so common today.
Kudos to you for your decision. It’s a litle difficult at first, but then it almost becomes a badge of honor. At least in my warped sense of personal pride, I guess…
Ben,
May I just say that you continue to impress me? There’s a lot of ridiculousness out there that passes as good. Movies my friends quote (and I’m not saying I’m super good because I’m definitely not) I’ve turned off. I’m not one to turn off movies if you know me. This world has gone crazy and it’s amazing to see someone standing up so strongly (while not forcing their beliefs on others) for what they know to be right.
Thank you so much.
Great post, Ben. You’re a better man than I. It’ll take a lot for me to shake the habit, (or the “Babyt”, if you will).
Good luck. I agree you’ll be better off as you stick to it.
Alan
twitter: aljmac
I realized just now that my comment sounds a little bit like I think it’s my friends who watch things they shouldn’t and I’m somehow better than them. That is not what I meant. I just meant that some of these movies are very widely spread and very popular even in this BYU culture we have. I don’t think I’m any better than my friends and I am actually probably worse in many ways.
Thanks for the thoughtful post. I know I have long resisted defining my entertainment choices solely by MPAA ratings (especially after seeing the documentary This Film is Not Yet Rated). As such, I tend to go by a personal litmus test of “Is this likely to be uplifting?” Or perhaps at least worthwhile, such as a story of hardship where something good comes of it. I like to take in a wide range of books and movies about subjects that interest me, and it is nice to do so with friends but not always possible. It can be difficult to stand out in a social situation, but it is important to stand by our personal choices too.
I would caution against the temptation to completely sanitize our media intake. There is often (though not always) a difference between portraying something and approving of it. In order to be confronted in art, evil must, to some degree, be portrayed. What would the Adam and Eve drama mean without Satan?
That said, I take pride in not knowing what movies are in the theaters, only seeing the occasional videos Gabe points out to me on Youtube, and watching about 4 hours of TV a year…. I’m no cultural-intellectual isolationist, but exposure to the mass media sewer generally leaves me feeling dirty and internally conflicted. I’m just not interested in beating down my conscience just so I can watch that stuff. Kudos for your integrity.
Katherine: I agree, the divorce of media choices from spirituality is rampant. For me I think it was a form of rationalization, trying to convince myself that it wasn’t actually affecting anything. That charade didn’t last long. :)
Connor: Even when I was watching all those movies I was still oblivious. :) But I’m with you, it’s a refreshingly good feeling to be out of that mire.
Ginger: No worries, it came across just fine. :) And thanks for your kind words.
Alan: Thanks. :) (And LOL on “Babyt.” I hope it catches on. ;))
Gina: Thanks. :) The social part is definitely hard, but people generally respect you for it. And even when they don’t, it feels good not to cave in.
Josh: Oh, I definitely agree. Depiction of evil doesn’t necessarily pull a movie out of line with the gospel’s standards; like you said, it’s the approval of evil that does. Movies (and any other type of story) that portrays no evil is boring and flat; conflict makes things interesting. (And since none of our lives is free from evil, it’s that conflict that helps us learn from movies and other stories and decide to choose good over evil.)
Ben and Josh, great points about the place of evil in moral media.
You know, movies and TV so often portray certain immoral behaviors as normal and acceptable, and it bothers me. It doesn’t have to be explicit; the implication that such things are condoned bothers me. When I’ve watched very much of anything like that, I can tell that it affects the way I think. Speaking of what I think, I feel a rant coming on…
Supposedly, when the media portray immorality as normal, it’s a reflection of how people act in the real world. There may be some truth in that. In fact, as time goes on there’s more and more truth in that, because this “reflection” influences the way people act in the real world. Here’s what I think happens: Hollywood portrays the immorality characteristic of some segment of culture that Hollywood knows or finds interesting. Then people all over the U.S. watch it, and they start thinking and acting like that’s what’s acceptable, even if they live in, say, a nice conservative Midwestern community where that sort of thing was never okay before. This may happen gradually, but really it only takes a generation, if that. Essentially, when the mass media produces things that are morally irresponsible (or perverse), and the masses eat it all up, our civilization is headed towards ruin. This needs to stop.
Combatting the putrescence of mainstream media requires action on two fronts: refusing bad medial while choosing the good, and publishing morally responsible media. Ben shows exemplary efforts on both fronts. I would brag about him more, but I’ll let his blogs and projects speak for themselves. Ben, thanks for being you.
Thanks, Kathy. :)
Throw in your two cents