If you haven’t noticed, I have a tendency to collect irons and stash them in the fire. :) (Why are golf clubs coming to mind? Wrong image. :P) I love having projects, love filling my to-do lists to the brim and beyond, love being busy.
But at the same time I don’t. I love having free time, love the peace of mind that comes when there aren’t any Damoclean deadlines hanging over my head, love being able to rest and recharge my batteries. (Oh no, the truth slipped out! I’m an android!)
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about this (busyness, not being an android), and while I certainly think it’s good to stay busy, I’m realizing that my priorities need some shifting around. I’ve been saying yes to almost everything that comes my way, like a dog drooling at the sight of a bone. This is not a good habit.
You see, I have some long-term goals in life — become a good (and prolific) writer and become a world-class typographer, to name just two — and in my desire to do good, I’m somewhat missing the mark and losing my opportunities to prepare for the best. I spend so much time doing peripheral stuff that I rarely get around to the core of why I’m here and what I was born to do.
It’s time to simplify. I need room to breathe. (It’s nobody else’s fault but my own that I’ve claustrophobized myself with tons of projects, mind you.) From now on, my default response to taking on new projects is going to be no, unless prolonged thought on the matter convinces me otherwise. I’m doing a 180. It’ll give me more time for things that really matter to me — writing, reading, typesetting, family history, family, and so on.
This is easy to say, but I don’t know how long it’ll take for me to retrain myself. :) What I do know is that saying yes to everything will burn me out someday. I want to get rid of that habit now so that when I have a wife and kids, I can actually spend time with them.
I suppose my fear with doing this is that I’ll be missing out on opportunities to serve — that it’s selfish of me to say no. But in all reality, I can’t do it all. I can’t even come close. And from now on, I’m going to stop trying. :)
Comments
Don’t cut back on projects too much. I have a project that will need your attention if it is ever to succeed!!
Um, I would just like to say that I support this motion. Without (again, I don’t mean to apologize, but I still do sort of feel bad for commenting as some random, unknown person all the time) knowing you or what you do to fill your time (although from your blog posts, it seems like quite a bit), there is nothing better than being able to take a step back and re-prioritize.
I think as a people (ok, or just as myself–I don’t know if I should be speaking for everyone else), we try to do it all. And we feel bad (guilty?) that we simply cannot. And yet it isn’t about how much we can cram in, but why we do what we do and what we are becoming in the process. Despite contrary opinion, more usually isn’t more. Unless it is just more overwhelming. This idea of decluttering is one of the main reasons I chose to move to a small (and somewhat remote) town after graduating from BYU; I wanted to be able to focus without all the distractions and demands and pressures; I wanted to be able to get to know people on a more intimate level; I wanted to be able to do a really good job at what I was doing (teaching). And I just want to say that for me, a simpler life has lead–in so many ways–to a fuller life (even though I have a terrible time of saying no still :)).
Now I don’t think you have to move to a small town to do it (or to a small cabin in the woods like Thoreau or Annie Dillard), but to make the conscious decision to do what’s right for you–and to proceed to do them for the right reasons. I hope you are successful in paring down and focusing on the things that matter most to you :).
Ben – I totally know what you mean. About a year and a half ago while I was working for IT Training, I had a dream to start my own web design business. I was taking on projects right and left, as well as going to school and working part time. I too loved to be busy with productive projects, but at the same time was feeling myself get burned out.
And it happened: I burnt out. Not like I suffered a nervous breakdown or anything, I was just like “what am I doing? This is crazy!”
A couple of things I learned:
1. Being too busy all the time makes it way harder to feel promptings from the spirit.
2. Being too busy makes it very hard to take time and ponder the state of your life and make little corrections when necessary.
3. Being too busy took me away from Meagan, so our relationship suffered.
4. I do not like to have to work when I’m at home with my family.
Good for you for cutting back!
Good luck simplifying. It does cut down on the stress.
Hil: We’ll talk. :)
Carly: Don’t feel bad, it’s quite okay. :) Thanks for the support! Moving to a small town does sound kind of blissfully free… Mmm.
James: Agreed! Being too busy can really destroy productivity, even.
Jared: Wow, that’s a really good article — thanks! I’m particularly thinking of how it applies to dating. Brilliant.
Throw in your two cents